What Pisses Me Off: The dreaded flu 96

What pisses me off


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Today is the 14 day of my new hell. I have managed to stay in an upright position for most of the time – it was only the one day that I was flattened and that was the morning I read a sign that said: One Positive Thought In The Morning Can Change Your Entire Day. Well, it didn’t change my day at all. I was positive that every muscle in my body was not going to stop aching just because I read something delightful, even when I managed to become vertical I was moving like a sloth on muscle relaxants.

The dreaded flu has made me into a human bacteria trap and even after 14 days, the flu is still my boss. It has attached itself to me like a bad spirit. Maybe I don’t need medication, maybe I need a string of garlic bulbs around my neck or holy water and a priest; I feel like a walking germ factory. When I coughed I sounded like a horn from a lighthouse guiding ships through dense fog and I hate cough medicine as it never works for me so I decided to go with the massaging Vapourub into the soles of my feet. It works well and has kept me cough free of a night. I thought maybe I would beat these evil germs with just a jar of Vapourub but then, the fourth day happened and everything went to hell. My nose blocked up so bad I kept dry retching, nothing was giving me any relief, and I even burnt my nasal passages with a eucalyptus nasal spray. I believe at one point I may have prayed for a swift death. I had taken so many cold and flu tablets I was worried about my kidneys. If I had been able to get to Boost Juice to get an orange pineapple and ginger juice every day, I may have beaten it by now.

The flu is a very big promoter of anti-social activity. I ran into a lady I had not seen for quite a while; she approached me from behind tapping me on the shoulder. If I had seen her coming, of course I would have warned her to keep her distance. I turn to greet her and a very phlegmy coughing fit and the inability to breathe with my mouth closed spoilt the moment completely. She looked at me like my head just did a 360 and then went into a massive rant telling me to get away from her as she didn’t want the flu. Well hello, you approached me and it’s not something I chose either. 

It’s hard to shake – everywhere you go people are coughing and sneezing, and not everybody covers their mouth. The dodgy weather has not helped my situation by any means and I wonder about the hand sanitisers. My hands are so dry from constantly using them, I am going to have to get some “miracle” hand creams. It really does cost a lot of money to get the flu.

This morning in utter frustration and the inability to taste my coffee led me to throw the cup at the fence. Of course it smashed and to my surprise my nose immediately started to clear. If I had known that was all I had to do to get some relief, I could have saved myself a small fortune at the chemist!


Can you sympathise with Christine? Have you had a bad flu this season?

Christine Massey

I am a 61-year-old dysfunctional child of a problem mother. I tend to look at the world with the philosophy "Laugh hard, you could be dead tomorrow!"

  1. Poor Christine. What a nasty dose! I do hope you are on the mend very soon.(I have to admit you did make me laugh though,sorry for that:-)

  2. Had the same thing for 4 weeks! Have the grandchildren to thank for that but then I spread it to everybody else in the family. Had my flu shot, took all the precautions especially hand washing, swallowed every legal drug to no avail. Next time i’ll try the coffee cup technique.

    1 REPLY
  3. Poor thing. Hope you’re better soon. I had flu injection and still got a three day chest infection which knocked me sidewise.

  4. Oh no, you poor girl I am getting over the flu too, I had the flu shot in the beginning of the season but the doctor told me I caught the B strain, it wasn’t in the needle !! Keep warm drink hot lemon juice honey and a dash brandy before bed. The flu is such a misery, I hope you feel better soon

    6 REPLY
    • last year I didnt have the flu shot and I didnt get sick,this year Imhad the flu shot and I have been sick ever since

    • Joy Williams most people I know who get the flu shot also get the flu. It is worse than useless. A big scam in other words.

    • I havent had the flu shot for about 12 years, sometimes I get the flu,sometimes I fly through winter,this year I got it because I was run down and I got careless…

    • Exactly, Christine, that’s why people get the flu, not taking care of their health…. too much junk food, not enough fresh fruit and vegetables, there is no ‘magic’ needle to save you.

    • I had a flu shot. It worked but I did get a very bad cold, two in fact, after a plane trip. I was affected for a month and felt horrible most of the time. Most people who think they have the flu just have colds.

  5. I haven’t had the flu for about 10 years and I’ve never had a flu shot. Every morning I take lemon juice mixed with bi carb soda in water. Also during autumn/winter I avoid dairy (mucous forming), wheat and refined sugar. Eat plenty of fresh fruit and veg, avoid processed food and take plenty of Vit C powder and Vit D ( or get out in the sun if possible). When taking vitamins use natural form, not synthetic.

  6. All my sympathy! Just completed week 3 of what I was told was pneumonia, then told it was viral bronchitis. Then the doctor said he thought it might have been dinky dye influenza. I had the flu shot in April, and the pneumonia shot last year. Whatever it was it has been horrendous. Please take great care of yourself. Lots of fluids, heaps of rest. The doctor has told me coughing for another 3 weeks and summer before total recovery!

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