What Pisses Me Off: Housework 135

What pisses me off


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This weekend I have done a bit of everything: cleaning, ironing, vacuuming, mopping floors, dusting, washing, ironing, cooking and I can honestly say every single aspect of housework pisses me off. It doesn’t end, and it is totally unappreciated. I was hoping that at least one of my personalities would enjoy some form of cleaning, but no, we all hate it!

I like my clothes clean, but I hate washing; I like my clothes ironed, but I hate ironing. I feel that the ironing pile is mocking me, so I bought myself a new iron, just so it knew I had intentions of getting to the bottom of it, but I think we both knew that was never going to happen. I often wonder what piece of clothing is at the bottom of the pile, something from the 70s perhaps?

Grocery shopping pisses me off – the entire process of picking food out, emptying the trolley at the checkout, repacking it after paying a ridiculous amount, and then loading and unloading the car. Of course when I arrive home I then have to unpack the groceries and go through the process of putting away, which is even more tedious. Don’t get me wrong, I like food, I enjoy eating food but having to shop then prepare it, then cook it, then sit down and eat – it is all too much drama and it tends to piss me off, and I can’t cook to save myself. I start off O.K. however I lose interest very quickly. I start off with butter chicken but it eventually turns into baked beans on toast. The only recipe I like making is sausages because it’s virtually impossible to ruin them, unless you burn them.

I also got the mowing done today, well, I supervised. Well, what I really did was go outside in the heat and give the gardener a cold drink and pay him for this work. Therefore, I am claiming the credit for how nice the yard looks at the moment, but in saying that, the grass is dead and well, that just pisses me off.

I am sitting in the cool breeze inside the garage. The floor is really pissing me off – I need to sweep it, but I really don’t want to get up, but I have to now that I have acknowledged it, otherwise it will bug the hell out of me.

It has been extremely hot today and the heat pisses me off; I have been sweating like a pig all day. In saying that, I quite like pigs…they don’t piss me off at all!

With summer very much on the horizon, I decided to wax my bikini line myself. I found some stuff that had to be rubbed into the area first, I did that but nothing happened, so I then applied the wax and holy mother of God; it was like I was on fire. I jumped in the shower to try and get some relief, I panicked when everything started going foggy. I thought I was having another stroke, but then I realised I still had my glasses on. I was saying Hail Marys in 3 different languages! I did not tell anybody, I just kept applying paw paw ointment all afternoon and suffered in silence. I just gave Mum her dinner tray and she said, “All afternoon you have been walking funny, you look like John Wayne going into a gunfight, stop doing that, it’s really pissing me off”. Cheers Mum.

Do you agree with Christine? What are some jobs or house work that really gets to you? Does your work go unnoticed? Tell us more below!

Christine Massey

I am a 61-year-old dysfunctional child of a problem mother. I tend to look at the world with the philosophy "Laugh hard, you could be dead tomorrow!"

  1. Loved your story Christine, just how I feel cracked me up.

  2. Do we have to use what p…..s me off all the time.Not everyone speaks like that.I do however enjoy and get a laugh out of most posts.

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