Divorce at any age is a trying time but divorcing in your 60s, often after more than 25 years of marriage, is a different kettle of fish.
There is an increasing number of over 60s going through divorce nowadays, with over a third of couples in their 60s choosing to part ways and explore other avenues separately.
The reasons for divorce are many: some couples simply grow apart, others see approaching retirement as a chance to enjoy their independence, while many see an opportunity for change once the kids are grown and have left home.
While it may seem taboo to speak about divorce as a positive, there are many reasons it can be the best thing for us.
Therapist and divorcee Jackie Walker says we often associate divorce with the bad and marriage with the good, when it’s clearly not always the case.
“Divorce gets bad press and marriage gets a hugely positive press, but frankly there’s nothing more miserable than being lonely in a marriage,” she told The Guardian.
“If all the people who were miserable could be less miserable what a nicer world we’d have.”
And isn’t that the truth? Choosing happiness is one of the best things we can do for ourselves. Focusing on the positive to help you deal with the negative is the real kicker here and one of the simplest ways we can lead happier lives.
We often associate divorce with pain and hardship; we sympathise with our friends who are going through it, and we struggle to cope as we navigate our own divorces. While these feeling are undeniably a part of divorce, an increasing amount of couples are choosing to see the bright side of the separation.
After years of staying together for financial reasons or the sake of the kids, getting a divorce allows them a breath of fresh air and the chance to take time for themselves.
Financial burdens are no longer an issue, with the kids out of the house and a decent amount of the mortgage paid off there is less pressure to keep it all together.
Divorce is difficult, there’s no denying that, but after working though the emotional aspects of it, after dealing with the logistics and the heartache and the sometimes overwhelming upheaval of your life – there is light.
There is time to focus on yourself, to explore the things you’ve let fall by the wayside over the years, to learn more about yourself, and rediscover what it means to be independent and free.
Life isn’t over after divorce. While you’re closing the book on that chapter you’re opening yourself up to a new world of possibilities. New opportunities to meet people, travel, experiment, and explore. All you have to do is begin.
Have you been through divorce in your 60s? Do you think there is a positive side to divorce?