Something you’re doing right now could be damaging your relationship 21



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If you’re reading this right now, then you’re already halfway there. A new study has shown the damaging effects that this can have on your relationship with your partner.

You may not have heard of it but there’s a term for what you could very well be doing right this minute: pphubbing. It means ‘partner phone snubbing’ and chances are you’ve seen it at restaurants, cafes, meetings, just about everywhere, including your own home.

A new study from Baylor University found that “Pphubbing” hurts relationship satisfaction, thus also negatively impacting overall happiness, reports TIME.

“What we discovered was that when someone perceived that their partner phubbed them, this created conflict and led to lower levels of reported relationship satisfaction,” James Roberts, a professor of marketing and co-author of the paper, said in a statement. “These lower levels of relationship satisfaction, in turn, led to lower levels of life satisfaction and, ultimately, higher levels of depression”.

We’ve all been there: how many times have you been trying to ask your partner something, only to receive no reply because their attention is on their phone? Maybe you’ve been the one doing it?

The study researchers developed a Pphubbing scale to assess how damaging it can be, with statements such as “my partner places his or her phone where they can see it when we are together” and “my partner glances at his/her phone when talking to me”. Sadly, 46.3 per cent of the respondents said they had been Pphubbed by their partner.

Professor Roberts said the results were astounding: “Something as common as cellphone use can undermine the bedrock of our happiness – our relationships with our romantic partners”.

So next time you’re considering picking up your phone while someone wants or needs your attention, will you think about it? Are you guilty of “pphubbing”?


Starts at 60 Writers

The Starts at 60 writers team seek out interesting topics and write them especially for you.

  1. You’ve done it again Starts at Sixty…showing the man as the perpetrator!

    5 REPLY
    • I think the problem there is that there are more men abusing women , than women abusing men but that is not to say it does not happen. I myself have heard one to 2 stories of shocking abuse from women towards men..cheers have a good day

    • John,, I reread the article and found Starts at Sixty purposefully did not use gender. I suggest you do too. I think an apology is due.

  2. I only look at my phone when I’m on my own he’s in the other room watching his TV me in another. He does think I’m a bit ‘nuts’ when he walks past me & says ‘not again?’ When I see something interesting or funny I like to share it but he tells me he’s not interested! So why should I be like him & bury my head in the sand etc. & not keep up with the so called technology, I’ m having too much fun to give it up now.I’ts up to him to try & keep up or loose the ‘race’!!!

  3. I am getting of this subject, have just come back from a Coach Tour in Europe and I think the biggest mistake the bus company’s have done is putting Wi Fi on the buses, every morning quite a few got on with there I Pads and phones and all switched them on reading emails, playing games reading there Kendal why bother to do a tour if that’s what you want to do I am no grouch but my friend and I took photos found time at night to download them and in the morning would check our phones and I Pads before going to breakfast then put them in the safe till we came back at the end of the day, people don’t seem to want to communicate these days.

    1 REPLY
  4. My wife is addicted to her iPad playing games frequently , even when we get into bed. She says she can’t sleep immediately so it helps her relax. However, she will always talk to me if I ask her something.

    I’m not addicted to my phone – it’s just a tool.

  5. I dare anyone to tour Europe for 30 days without ANY mobile devices!! We did it and what a pleasure. Luckily hubby and I are not addicted to them at all. Mobiles phones are there for emergencies and computers and laptops for internet banking and looking at emails – very quickly – and then FB for an update. If everybody cuts back on their phone plans and internet plans, WOW, you might find money for other interests. That is just what we did 10 years ago, and our dream Europe vacation became reality!! Try it!! You might surprise yourself!!

  6. Warning Coarse language.

    This remindes me of a quote I saw recently.

    “An iPhone is like a penis. It’s good to play with when you are at home alone but you don’t play with it when you are at the dinner table”

    or another one.

    “The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.”

  7. I read my iPad at breakfast because my husband is watching the news on Tele (watching the news puts me in a bad mood). However if I am at lunch and someone is looking at their phone or iPad I tell them to put it away or I am leaving as I consider it very rude!

  8. This is absolute rubbish. I can understand it if you were referring to the younger generation, but to say us oldies are doing this is utter nonsense. I have had enough of this page and the silly nonsense which is coming across. I have had enough and am signing out.

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