I was listening with much entertainment to a group of nearly and over 60 year old women the other day, all of whom were lamenting at their millennial children and the fact that they simply won’t move out of the family home.
It seems to be a large topic of conversation and one that makes everyone want to laugh and cry, after all, we all love our children dearly, we just don’t want to love feeding, powering, insuring and cooking for them anymore after a certain point of life.
My sister in law finally moved out of the family home at the humble age of 30. In fact, I’m sure she didn’t do it willingly, with her parents moving a long way from the city to a “change of scenery” that was more than an inconvenient location for commuting.
Other family members have been known to make it to the age of 33+ living with their adoring mums who cooked, cleaned and served all their needs so well they simply didn’t ever want to go.
So today we ask you have you got a challenge with your millennial, or have you found a terrific way to shoehorn them out of the family home? Share it with us.
Here are some entertaining tips we found when talking to a few people who have conquered the problem.
Stop providing too many in-home services for them
My mother in law was a wonderful “magical laundry basket”, that is, her kids would put their clothes in the laundry basket and they would miraculously reappear within 24 hours on a hanger, pressed and in the wardrobe. If I had a service like that on hand and didn’t have to pay rent for it, I would never leave it either. Do you find yourself keeping alive the wonderful parenting habits your kids needed when they were younger, but should be developing independence in now they are adults?
Cut the insurance and phonebill strings
The ladies I listened to spoke of still paying for their childrens’ health insurance and car insurance bills, and most said their kids were still on the family mobile phone account too. Lovely if you can get it I guess and pragmatic for the kids. But do you think this breeds a child that learns how to incrementally handle their own expenses?
Help and encourage them to get out and hustle
Many of the people I speak to say their kids are working so hard they don’t have time to make a life for themselves. Others say their kids don’t take care of themselves, so staying at home becomes their norm. If you allow it, and make it to homely I don’t blame them! Do you!?
There is much thought that a motivated adult should be out there networking, working hard, and hustling to try and break free from the nest. If you find his or her friends constantly coming over and doing who knows what in their rooms all day, your child could be way too comfortable for his or her own good or should I say YOUR own good.
Encourage your children to try “housesitting”
There is always a family friend that needs someone to housesit for them for a month or two during the June/July holidays, and if you can’t find one, consider suggesting they look on a housesitting website. You might find that if they live out of home, in a fully equipped yet independent house, they get a taste for it.
Obligate them to more jobs round the house
If your in-home adult child is living rather concern free it might be time to impose a few more of the housey obligations on them so they recognize that freedom doesn’t last forever. Give them a three month program to shape up the garden, or ask them to take on the mowing, bathroom cleaning or meal preparation regularly and hold them accountable.
Print out the rental listings and leave them on the bench
If all else fails, you could print out the rental listings and leave them lying on the kitchen table. At least that way they know you are serious, and they know how much they are getting for nothing.
Have you shoehorned a millennial out of your family home? Can you offer some tips?