I don’t regret getting married young 8



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The age of a bride and groom when they walk down the aisle has steadily increased in recent decades. While in the 1960s and ’70s the average age for a woman to get first get married was 20 and 22 for men, today — more than 30 years later — that number has moved up to 27 years.

While tying the knot between the ages of 20 and 23 might not be the done thing any more, there are plenty of women who stand behind their decision to get married a little earlier than most.

Sarah met her husband-to-be when she was just 18, and fell madly in love. But it wasn’t until two years later, when she was blissfully celebrating at their engagement party Sarah was first seriously confronted about the whirlwind romance, and her very young age.

“One of my relatives stumbled up to me,” Sarah explains.

“Just tipsy enough to be honest, she pulled me aside and slurred in my ear: ‘Just make sure this is something you really want … Your 20s are such a special time. Make sure you really get to enjoy them.’”

Despite the warnings Sarah knew she had found ‘The One’.

“He made me laugh harder than anybody else, and he had a steady job. Whether I got married at 32 or 22, this was the person I wanted to spend my life with without a doubt. Why wait?”

Fast-forward six years and Sarah and her husband are still happily married, and while neither of them regret their decision to marry young, Sarah is the first to admit she can see her tipsy relative’s point looking back.

However, Sarah says getting married at a young age didn’t come without consequences.

“By our first anniversary — married and pregnant with our first child — we no longer had as much in common with our non-married, non-parent friends. The decision to marry was the right one for us, but it created a gradual rift between us and our college-aged friends that I feel sad about to this day. I assumed that not much would change after we were married, that we’d have the same social circle, that we’d still have essentially the same lives as we did before. I was wrong.”

It seems age didn’t matter for Vivianne either.

“When I look back now, 20 years old seems so young, but my mum married at that age — and so did her mum,” Vivianne, who is now in her late-40s, says.

“I’ve heard people say that if you marry young you’re more likely to get divorced because you don’t know who you are, but that doesn’t ring true for me.”

While Sandy says when she got married at 22 it was an opportunity for her and her new husband to build a life together.

How old were you when you first got married? Did your family have anything to say about your decision? Do you think there is an ‘ideal age’ to tie the knot?

Guest Contributor

  1. I was 19 my husband was 22. I guess to be honest I can see advantages to bieng older and advantages to bieng younger! My husband and I have been married 45 years and we still love each other. We disagree about some things agree about others. We have 3 children 8 grandchildren and life has been like it is for most people a roller coaster ride. I said in a status one day for his birthday that he was my gold lotto ! When you do a list of positives and negatives for your life and marriage my positive list is massive negative small by comparison. I was a young Nana as well and have had the best time with my Grandchikdren who are aged from 22 down to 9. It was a different time so you can not compare.

  2. I was 22 when I married first time back in 1973 but 10 years before me my cousin was married at 16 and is still married to her husband and she would be about 70 now.

  3. We met when I was 15 and he was 18, married at 18 and 21, had 3 children. and have just celebrated our 55th wedding anniversary. We believe life is what we make it, we have had our ups and downs like every relationship, although not that many really. But wouldn’t change a thing, we have been blessed with 3 children, 7 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren. Wouldn’t change a thing even the odd ups and downs have been so worth it!!!

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  4. I was nearly 21 and my husband 23 years old when we wed. We have been married for 46 years. Before we could get married (In New Zealand) it was a requirement of the Anglican Church to attend pre – marriage classes. Outside of the religious aspect of marriage there was a wholesome approach to the partnership you were committing to. These covered all aspects of married life, from money to having children, accepting friends of each others, relationships with your spouses family and so the list went on. All the things that are still relevant today. In the group we were with two couples opted to hold off getting married and I know for a fact one couple did marry a couple of years later. It’s so sad that these classes aren’t relevant anymore as I think a lot of people would learn so many life skills. Given my time again I would certainly marry my husband without a second thought.

  5. I met my husband when 13, he 18. We married at 20 and 25. Two sons when I was 22 and 24. We had so many wonderful years together until he died at 49 in 1993. Although my life has gone on, I still miss this loving man!

  6. I was married at 43 and I still think I was too young.

  7. I read this piece of writing completely concerning the difference of most recent and preceding technologies, it’s remarkable article.

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