Commemorating the life of someone you love… you! 25



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A little while ago, we brought you the story of a great-grandfather who decided to host his own wake. Many of your thought this was a wonderful idea – after all, what’s the point of having people say nice things about you if you’re not there to demurely deny them?

Now they’re calling it: hosting your own funeral is officially a trend in the US.

According to Next Avenue, some American funeral homes are helping cater to the demand. One funeral services guide offers ideas for “celebrating the life of a loved one before death,” complete with tips on organising such events.

Tips include having a guest book for everyone to write a personal message, or setting up a memory table where guests can leave significant items for the person.

There are some advantages to arranging yours or a loved one’s funeral pre-mortem – obviously, it give people the chance to pay tribute to the person’s life and achievements, but it can also provide opportunity to attend to practical matters such as details of the will, resolving any long-burning issues or feuds, and doing research for the eulogy.

You also get to choose the music and who gets to speak.

However, there’s the potential that the event might not exactly be fun for the participants and can be a huge emotional burden. It could also be considered a tad narcissistic, especially if the would-be-deceased is in robust health and planning a round-the-world adventure.

What do you think: will this trend catch on? Have you ever been to the funeral of someone who is still alive? Would you go to one if invited?

Starts at 60 Writers

The Starts at 60 writers team seek out interesting topics and write them especially for you.

  1. Absolutely no way this is definitely going to far, I have to wonder at times who is responsible for these ridiculous ideas. It sounds like another excuse to spend or waste money to me.

  2. if people are going to have to buy a gift to go to a funeral , many will not go, many buy flowers as it and for older people like pensioners the cost to say farewell to a friend will be prohibitive

  3. My dad had written down the songs he wanted before he passed away, he had been ill for a little while and conveyed to his closest family his wishes. i agee with the other comments host your own wake No… funerals to honour your loved ones is still the ways to go

  4. If you have a beautiful family whom you love and love you back, then there should be no need to arrange things yourself. Your family know you and love you enough to arrange exactly what suits you and those you are leaving behind.

  5. Some will like the idea and others will like the money they receive for organising. Sounds pretty stupid to me.

  6. Isn’t that what Parties are about, except it’s not calling it your own wake. If I was about to pass away , I guess people calling in for a glass of wine and goodbye might just tipple me over the edge. ……

    1 REPLY
  7. A funeral is for the family to celebrate your life – it is for them to do in their own way – whatever helps them to relate to their loved one and to help heal their grief. If a person has died, they are not going to be worried about how the funeral is run.

  8. I have told my family I don’t want a funeral, just go and have a party.

    3 REPLY
    • Just had that same conversation with one of my children last night. I have told them in my will it will state no funeral, just send me off to the crematorium – no box pick up the ashes and spread them whey my parents lay. Worked too hard for my money to be burned in an expensive box. I have always been realistic, may seem harsh but these are my wishes. Most of my friends will not be there as they themselves have passed so would rather the kids buy something like a diamond to wear in my memory with the money.

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