A quiet young fellow always felt lonely, never seemed to have anybody to talk to.
He was walking past a pet shop and saw a sign for a talking centipede. He was a bit doubtful but went in and spoke to the owner.
The owner brought out a centipede and spoke to it. Surprised, the young man heard it answer. He bought it on the spot. The pet shop owner placed it in a beautifully made little white box.
The young man took the centipede home with him and made a special place for its box on the kitchen bench. A bit later on, he stopped by the bench and asked, “Would you like to go to the pub tonight?”
There was no answer, so he asked again a few minutes later, “Hey, how’d you like to go to the pub?”
Again, no response. He waited a couple more minutes before putting his mouth down by the box and shouting, “ARE YOU WANTING TO GO TO THE PUB…?”
This time, the centipede replied, quite annoyed, “Don’t be impatient! I heard you the first time. Let me get my goddamn boots on!”