The psychology of downsizing. The story of a couple who packed up their life and moved onto a boat

For many people, packing up and moving into a smaller place is a natural part of retirement. An American blogger named Melody and her husband didn’t want to wait until retirement to live their dream of living on a house boat, so they set about the task of downsizing in order to live their dream on the water.

In a recent post on her blog, Saving to Sail, Melody detailed the psychological journey her and her husband went on when they started what she refers to as ‘Project Downsize’.

“When we first decided to sell the house and move onto a sailboat, the allure of warm breezes and palm trees was quickly overshadowed by the reality that we had to get rid of most of our stuff to get there,” she said. “We knew downsizing wouldn’t be an easy task.”

While she insists they didn’t have as much stuff as lots of people, they found this made their task even more difficult.

“What few material things we did have, we had for a reason,” she said. “Most of our stuff consisted of things we really loved, or that had sentimental value. But downsizing was necessary, since our already-small square footage would now be reduced by about 80 per cent.”

The first stage of their downsizing mission involved going through their closets looking for clothes, shoes, and accessories to donate to Goodwill.

“We filled a huge trash bag and dropped it off at the kerbside donation centre and felt really good about it… until we got back home to our closets and somehow it didn’t look like we’d gotten rid of a thing.”

So, they went through their possessions again, this time making four piles – sell, keep, donate, and trash. Melody began to notice that the ‘keep’ pile was the largest of the four.

“That’s when I realised that, while I didn’t want to admit it, getting rid of my stuff made me a little sad. It was hard,” she said.

What they came to find was that it wasn’t the objects themselves that made it hard, but rather the memories that those objects held.

“Even silly things like an elephant figurine that I had picked up at a flea market because he was crooked and quirky looking,” Melody said.

“There was no strong sentimental memory attached to it — it was simply something that made me happy to look at, nothing more.”

“I had a long, honest talk with myself and began asking myself why each object in my “keep” pile was there. What kept me hanging on? Was keeping my things more important than building a new life of travel and wanderlust on our new sailboat?”

After answering a resounding ‘no’ to that question, Melody says she knew that she had to be serious about downsizing, and that meant being ruthless about decluttering.

“We listed things one by one on Craigslist and eBay, and little by little, we started to make a dent in our stuff, while padding our wallets,” she recalls.

“And guess what? After a while, we no longer felt the sting of getting rid of things we once considered precious.

“Doing away with our stuff became a high all its own. It was cleansing and cathartic. It was fun.”

In the end, they sold or donated almost everything they owned, with the exception of some original artworks, books, and a few sentimental items.

“I can honestly say the only thing I regret is not doing it sooner,” Melody said.

Now, they are happily living on a sailboat with a tiny fraction of their belongings, and have never been happier.

“My life is no longer dictated by what I own,” Melody insists.

“I no longer feel the pressure of walking through a mall and not wanting to leave empty-handed, or of feeling wasteful when I buy something I know I don’t need.

“There’s a saying that goes, ‘The less you own, the less that owns you.’ I can vouch for that. I feel less stressed, more in control, and cleaning is a whole lot faster, which allows me more time to do the things I enjoy.”