‘I clean my house before my cleaner arrives. Am I mad?’

Oct 19, 2020
Julie has a little cleaning problem on her hands. Source: Getty

Enter the cleaning lady! I am wasting my thoughts on housework. I do not remember getting this old, old enough to need a cleaner. In past years, my mother had a cleaner as part of an expensive aged care package. Mum was frail, deaf, half blind and struggling on a walking frame. I used to wonder why she would do the housework after the house cleaners had gone home. She was too scared to complain about them to the head honcho of aged care.

Around the same time, I had a friend, also geriatric, who did her housework before her council cleaner visited every week. These days, I have breathing, hip and knee issues, and do need a house cleaner. Surprise! I find myself sweeping and mopping the tiled floor before the cleaning lady arrives. I am supposed to be proud when she says the unit is clean and tidy.

Why are they so intimidating, these house cleaners? It is a real mystery and no one knows for sure. All these cleaners are getting paid for doing housework, but, like ninnies, we seem to be doing more housework now than before. Unfortunately, my days of super housework are over. So with cleaners over the past few years, I have taken the good with the bad. One male house cleaner was dreadful. He arrived late, skived off to have a cigarette, spent a lot of time on his phone, and did not much at all.

I was too scared to complain in case I got someone worse. I put up with his inadequacy for two years, until the unit’s owner obtained a house cleaner with an aged care package. Now we have a veritable queen of clean.

Oh no! It’s cleaning day. Quick, must tidy up and mop the floors. Look, I bought a vertical vacuum so I can vacuum the carpets first! Wait, isn’t this her job? This is verging on the ridiculous.

Which famous scribe wrote that housework is boring, meaningless and counter-productive? Classic. Here we all are, wasting more thoughts on housework. Now I know what my mum and friend went through. Shhh, I am doing the dusting again. Must hurry, she is due soon. Enter, the cleaner! Scary.

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