A mother was anxiously awaiting the arrival of her daughter’s plane. Her daughter was returning from abroad, where she’d enjoyed months of adventure during a ‘gap year’.
As the daughter exited the plane and walked out to the arrivals lounge, her mother noticed a man directly behind her dressed in feathers, with exotic markings all over his body and carrying a shrunken head.
The daughter introduced the man as her new husband.
The mother gasped in disbelief.
“I said for you to marry a rich doctor … A rich doctor!”
Husband: Sweetheart, would you say that I’m the only man you’ve ever loved?
Wife: Of course you are! Why do all men ask me the same silly question?
Rupert and Elaine, a young couple, got married and went happily on their honeymoon. When they got back, Elaine immediately telephoned her mother, who asked how the honeymoon was.
“Oh, Ma,” Elaine replied. “The honeymoon was wonderful. It was so romantic.” Then she burst out crying. “But, Ma, as soon as we returned home, Rupert started using the most ghastly language… saying things I’ve never heard before! I mean, all these awful four-letter words! You’ve got to come get me and take me home. I can’t be in a marriage like this! Please Ma!” Elaine begged.
“Calm down, Elaine!” said her mother. “Tell me, what could be so awful? What four-letter words?”
Still sobbing, Elaine whispered, “Oh Ma, words like ‘dust’, ‘wash’, ‘cook’ and ‘iron’.”