A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says: “Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.”
Then they walk around the ranch a little and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says: “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”
The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks: “And what are those?”
The Aussie asks with an incredulous look: “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”
A man runs to the doctor and says: “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!”
The doctor asks: How long was she had this condition?”
“Two years,” replies the man.
“Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asks the doctor.
The man shrugs his shoulders and replies: “We needed the eggs.”
A gentleman entered a busy florist shop displaying a large sign that read: “Say It With Flowers.”
“Wrap up one rose,” he told the florist.
“Only one?” the florist asked.
“Just one,” the customer replied. “I’m a man of few words.”
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