There’s nothing more exciting than becoming a grandparent and for many, embracing the new and unique role is one of the most rewarding jobs in life. However, it can also be very tricky to know exactly where the boundaries lie and what you should and shouldn’t do.
One grandma has found herself in hot water after revealing she took her two grandchildren to church without asking her daughter first. Writing to ‘Ask Amy’ in The Mercury News, the confused grandma asked whether she was in the wrong.
“I have two wonderful grandchildren who occasionally spend Saturday nights with me,” she began. “My daughter (their mum) knows that I go to church on Sundays. I decided to bring my grandchildren with me because I want to raise them in my faith, the way I raised my daughter.
“Now, my daughter is angry with me because I did this. Who is right?”
Amy Dickinson told the upset grandma that while she has no right to introduce her grandchildren into her faith without their parents’ permission, her daughter is also held accountable as she knows her mum goes to church every Sunday.
“You don’t have the right to introduce your grandchildren into your faith practice without their parents’ permission,” she wrote. “On the other hand, your daughter knows you go to church. I’m assuming she knows what time you go to church.
“Because she doesn’t want her children having this experience, she should pick them up before you leave the house on Sundays.”
Commenters were quick to weigh in on the debate as well, with one saying it isn’t that big of a deal. “My grandmother was a devout catholic and played organ for her church,” the user wrote. “When my siblings and I stayed with her, she took us to church and we sat in the back row. We were bored, but weren’t indoctrinated into her faith. So if mum is concerned that they are being coerced into following some religious faith, a few trips to church with grandma isn’t going to do that.”
While another said the bit the grandma said about wanting to raise them in the faith raised red flags for her and the mum has every right to be upset.
“Even so, mum has a perfect right to not want them to go to church,” she wrote. “But like Amy says, in that case she needs to pick them up early, so Grandma can go to church alone. The bit about wanting to raise them in the faith though makes me think there’s more going on than just ‘I have to bring them along because I don’t have a sitter’. Grandma needs to take a step back if so.”