Letters to the Editor are a proud part of newspaper history, but with more and more going out of print there are fears it could soon become a thing of the past.
Could the media stop using the phrase “otherwise law-abiding” when describing people who have broken the law? You’ll be referring to the likes of Harold Shipman as an “otherwise law-abiding” murderer next.
The modern world
SIR – My first thought on seeing your headline, “Pupils to be taught about sex at seven” was, “What, in the morning?”
When I was a child, the school day began with prayer. But you can’t stop progress.
SIR – I’ve often wondered whether Britain’s education system is in a state of decline. Then I visited Google and started to type, “Can I get…”. Before I finished my query the first suggested search in the drop-down list appeared: “Can I get pregnant from a dog?”. Now I know.
Castle Rising, Norfolk
Our leading bishops demand hard evidence of Saddam Hussein’s possessions of weapons of mass destruction. If we were to demand the same level of proof from their profession, they would all be out of a job.
Times, January 21
SIR – Perusing the papers today, I was struck by the number of advertisements for walk-in baths, each of which featured an attractive blonde of around 42, pictured either entering or leaving the bath in a swimsuit via the side door. Is there any particular reason for this age group of blonde ladies requiring walk-in baths? I suspect it may be related to wine but perhaps I have missed something.
SIR – If I tried balancing my drink on the side of the bath, as suggested by one of your correspondents, I would probably end up with coq au vin.
SIR – A current West Sussex NHS advertisement on the back of a bus states: “You are twice as likely to have unprotected sex after heavy drinking”.
Another pint, please, landlord.
Haywards Heath, West Sussex
SIR – I have a soft spot for Sarah Ferguson; my dream girl looked like her and she reminds me of a boisterous Labrador, my favourite breed of dog.
Beyond the grave
Why is it when someone dies they are spoken of highly despite their shortcomings in life? Of Lord Jenkins it was said: “He was one of the most remarkable people to grace British politics … He had intellect, vision and integrity.” The fact is he was a turncoat, an intellectual snob and partly responsible for Thatcherism.
Daily Mirror, January 15
Think of the animals
SIR – Could you sometimes leave a picture of Martin Johnson out of your sport supplement? We all know by now what he looks like – poor fellow – and you are frightening the horses.
Walton on the Naze, Essex
SIR – There is a brilliant and simple solution to the controversy over racial profiling at airports. All passengers will be required to step into a booth that scans for explosive devices and automatically detonates any device found. Harmless individuals will be released immediately after being scanned. Muffled explosions, contained within the booth, will be followed by an announcement that a seat has become available for standby passengers.
It’s a win-win for everyone.
SIR – As David Cameron struggles to save money, he could well look at Sport, Culture, Art and Music (SCAM), which have drained the British taxpayer of some £560 million every year for the last 20 years, to the benefit of no one except the thousands of luvvies that this money keeps in fine corduroy style.
Surely they could do just as well down a coal mine, if only to marvel at the wonder of it all.
SIR – I have to admit that I misjudged the strength of feeling by public-sector workers against the cuts – right up to the moment I tried to reduce by 25 per cent the amount of housekeeping money I give to my wife.
SIR – Am I alone in hating Ryanair more than the Taliban and liquorice combined?
Carousel 1, Stansted Airport
SIR – A recent article reported that confectionery manufacturers were discreetly shrinking the size of their chocolate bars. Is the same thing happening to men’s underwear, or am I just getting older?
SIR – On being given a banana for the first time, during the Second World War, I ate it with the skin on. I also did this with an orange. Happily, I was later shown the correct way to eat a banana and an orange and grew to like them very much.
George E. Bryant