The words please and thank you are some of the first children are taught growing up, as parents try to raise their kids to be respectful. However, one gran has sparked a debate online after she questioned whether once essential manners are now a thing of the past, revealing that her grandson never thanks her for birthday or Christmas gifts.
The concerned and upset grandmother raised the topic on popular online forum Gransnet after realising the absence of the polite words from her adult grandson’s vocabulary.
Painting a picture of the troubling situation, she said her 21-year-old grandson doesn’t say thank you when he receives a present unless he is specifically asked by his father to do so.
“I must say I am mystified by this departure from tradition let alone kindness. I wonder have I done something that offended him, or what? I also wonder if this not saying thank you is a modern trend among young people,” she wrote.
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Considering bringing up the issue with her grandson, the gran added that she was concerned this behaviour would continue if nothing was said. She added: “I do want to give him the benefit of the doubt. On the other hand it does him no favours if I encourage him to disrespect his granny.”
Sadly, most responses confirmed her worries that saying thank you has in someways gone out of fashion and the word is simply not used as frequently as it once was.
One sympathetic user commented: “I think it’s how things are nowadays. It was very big deal when I was young, to receive a present or money, but these day, not so much. Plus we had my mum breathing down our necks to make sure we said thank you, which I think is less likely to happen now.”
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Another added: “It really bewilders me that, in a day and age when communication has never been easier, saying thank you for a gift seems to have become harder and harder for some people to do. You are not being unreasonable. It is a simple courtesy that no 21-year-old should need to be reminded of.”
While others suggested perhaps it was time to forego the presents and instead think of other ways the gran could contribute to her grandson’s future.
“To be blunt he can’t be bothered (arsed as they say) why should you? [give presents]. That’s not being horrible or nasty, it’s just being realistic and saving yourself a lot of pain. I know how this feels and was pleased when I realised that it was me who was actually hurting myself. You can’t alter others behaviour but you can alter yours,” they said.