Let’s Talk: Is it okay to tell your kids how to raise your grandkids?

We all love to help our kids out with their parenting, but how far is too far? The issue has

We all love to help our kids out with their parenting, but how far is too far?

The issue has again hit social media, after a post on a website for mothers caused a debate.

So, what’s causing all the debate?

Well, a woman using the screen name Blondeandinept posted on the site Mumsnet asking for advice about her children’s lunch servings.

The meal of crumbed chicken, mozzarella sticks, salad and vegetables was for her six-year-old son and three-a-half-year-old daughter.

But apparently her mother-in-law was “appalled” by the size of the servings.

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“My mil [mother-in-law] saw this and was appalled. Said it was way way too much. My children would be peckish an hour later if they didn’t have this kind of lunch (it’s the weekend, hence all the breaded items!)” the woman wrote.

“‘My son is on the 75 centile for height, 20 for weight,’ she explained. ‘My daughter is 50 for height, 25 for weight.

“As a family we are very very slim (in 5’7 and weigh just under 8 stone). We’re very fit, gym, sport etc.'”


The posted attracted more than 360 comments from mothers across the world, drawing a variety of opinions on whether the lunch serving was adequate or not.

“I think you should relax – if they are eating this amount and are a normal weight, it’s fine. And it’s none of her business,” one mother wrote.

“Looks fine to me, plenty of veg on the plate. Kids are great at telling you if they are too full/don’t want it. Ignore, they’re your kids!” another wrote.

Some of the comments on the post. Source: Mumsnet
Some of the comments on the post. Source: Mumsnet

But not everyone was as supportive.

“Actually looks too little, your cheesey things, 2 chips, 1 babycorn and few carrots/sprigs of brocolli  tho fab variety of veg,” another woman wrote.
“The 5yr i looked after as a nanny would have demolished this in seconds.”

It’s debates like this that can quite often lead to arguments between parents/parents-in-law and their children.

So, what do you think? Is it okay to give advice to your kids? At what point is it over-stepping the mark?


  1. Dianne Evans  

    No comment is better unless child is staving!

  2. Maria Murphy  

    Butt out – unless they are being mistreated it has nothing to do with you. Sometimes questions maybe asked then answers can be given.

  3. Johanna Saunders  

    The kids know how much they want to eat. If they want more, they ask. I have two grandkids. One eats more than the other. What they eat at home is their parents business. Not mine.

  4. judy  

    I am with Maria on this. If your grown up kids ask for advice, give it. If not, say nothing.

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