I'm a grumpy old woman

I’m a grumpy old woman – or so I’ve just been told,

I wonder why this is – so let my story unfold.

I was born on a freezing cold morning – a mistake so my parents did say,

And my debut was not very welcome, so we all felt grumpy that day!

My sister was instantly hostile and shoved me in a drawer,

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My brother wasn’t much better and wanted to “even the score”.

So between them my life was precarious – some days lucky to be alive.

So I became a grumpy little sibling – the third one to arrive.

Though mum and dad assured me I was the best mistake ever made,

This didn’t sit well with my siblings, as I “rained on their parade”.

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Then arrived the teen years, with problems by the score.

Acne, pimples, boyfriends – do I need to tell you more?

I finally met the man of my dreams and was happy as could be,

We had two lovely children – well we almost had three,

Which made me think of mum and dad and their mistake in having me!

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The next big thing was menopause – hot flushes every day.

Bright red face, I want to cry – oh please just go away.

The moods did swing back and forth from happiness to sad,

I then became “invisible” which made me grumpy and mad.

My joints have now joined forces and seize up when they like,

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Despite my early morning walks and going on my bike.

So if I’m feeling grumpy, I think I’ve earned the right,

‘Cos each and every day I put up a jolly good fight.

To be honest I’m not really grumpy and have much to be thankful for,

I have four wonderful grandchildren, whom I just adore.

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But now and then I like a good moan – a grumpy old woman for sure,

But I count my blessings every day and hope I have many years more.

Thanks to Chris for sending this in!