Two French paratroopers

Two French paratroopers were seconded to the SAS for special training.

After the first day they met up in the bar. “Ah, Francois,” asks one, “‘ow ‘av you been doing?”

“Merde!” answers Francois. “I ‘av ‘ad ze most terrible day. Terrible! At seex zis morning I was woken by zis beeg ‘airy sergeant. ‘E dragged me out of bed and on to ze parade ground.”

“And zen what ‘appened?”

“I will tell you what ‘appened! ‘E made me climb urp zis seely leetle platform two metres off ze ground and zen ‘e said “Jurmp!” 

“And did you jurmp?” 

“I did not. I told ‘im – ‘I am a French paratrooper. I do not jurmp Two metres. Eet is beneath my dignity.’ ”

“And zen what ‘appened?” 

“Zen ‘e made me climb urp zis seely leetle platform five metres off ze ground, and ‘e said “Jurmp.”

“And did you jurmp?”

“I did not. I told ‘im – ‘I am a French paratrooper. I do not jurmp five metres. Eet is beneath my dignity’.” 

“What ‘appened zen?”

“Zen ‘e made me climb urp zis rickety platform thirty metres above ze parade ground. ‘E came right up to my face and ‘e said, ‘If you do not jurmp, I am going to kees you right on ze mouth!'”

“Sacre Bleu, mon ami. And did you jurmp?”

“A leetle, at ze beginning.”

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