Doctors say there’s nothing wrong with your funny bone

Jake was never thought of as the sharpest tool in the shed. As the years went on, he wasn’t known for taking very good care of himself either. When he complained about a new ailment, his wife made him an appointment with his doctor straight away.

“What seems to be the problem, Jake?” the doctor asked as he came into the room.

“I get a sharp pain in my eye whenever I drink coffee, Doc,” Jake said.

The doctor was perplexed by this as he had never heard of anything like it before. “Does it happen all the time, Jake?” asked the doctor.

“Every time,” Jake said, slightly worried.

The doctor asked Jake to try to recreate the problem so he could try and determine the problem. The doctor made Jake a coffee and slid it to Jake. Jake put some sugar and milk in the cup and stirred it up. He took a big sip and screamed in pain. The doctor nodded.

“I know what’s causing the problem, Jake.” The doctor said confidently.

“Is it serious?” Jake asked nervously.

The doctor placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “No, it’s a simple fix. You need to take the spoon out of the cup before you drink it.”

Marie was going on a cruise with some of her girlfriends and was a bit worried because she gets seasick easily. She has tried every pill, lotions, and potions that people have suggested but nothing worked. Marie even tried different types of meditation and exercise to try to overcome the ailment but when it came time to set sail she was leaning over the railing.

Determined to have a good cruise, this time, she went to the doctor to see if there was any prescription strength medicine she could take to help. Shockingly as the doctor went through the list of options she had tried them all.

After thinking about it for a minute, the doctor said: “Well, before you leave dock you could eat an entire can of stewed tomatoes, swallow some blueberries whole, and drink some hot water with crushed Nori leaves in it.”

Marie sat up in her chair, “Will that help?” she asked.

“No, but it should look pretty in the water. The Nori will make it all sparkly.”

Are you enjoying our specially-crafted humour? When was the last time you had to visit the doctor?