Why do smart people like ourselves keep moving in and out of challenging situations? Sometimes I think it could be easier to stay safe and stuck, but no, I have to live my life as fully as I can even if I make a bit of a mess of some parts.
So as a business life coach I have firstly had to listen to my own challenges and find a way to move through the rut, the brick wall that looms up ahead. And this is a list that I forget some times, many times and when I need it try to take my own advice. So here is the Red Brick wall motivation, think about Dorothy as she moves along the road to the golden..
- Have great friends, even a few that you can talk to. Friends who know you warts and all. People who will listen, they don’t have to solve the challenge but be there for you.
- Be open about the Rut, if you try to be a person who is strong and can move through these times you can be guaranteed that somewhere along the challenge you will fall down. The hardest thing for me was to admit to friends who saw the smart successful woman that I was hurting and not coping. They were there for me.
- Try not to get caught up in the intoxicating patterns of being in a stuck place. You have been there before, guaranteed, know it well and the hardest thing is to stop the tape loops going through your head. Like good wine, intoxication is great for a short amount of time, but make sure you let go stop and come out without a hangover.
- Have a routine each day that gets you out of your environment. I work mainly on my own, so to stop the rut stuff, go to the gym, yes see my clients, and get out to social events regularly.
- Remember that at our age you will have some great transferable skills from your career, life that you can pass on to others. Find ways to leverage your achievements. Eg if you were a great teacher you will be very good at organising events, but make sure they are ones you enjoy.
- Travel frequently, even if it is to parts of your town, city that you don’t know well. Is reinvigorating to find new buildings, shops, cafes, get the feel of a place you don’t know well. And holiday to different places instead of returning to somewhere you know well.
- Read constantly just be curious about the world around you. Read articles that may not normally be of interest. It is amazing what you can learn from new ideas and material. I quite often come away inspired by learning more about parts of my life that normally would not interest.
- Keep being curious about life. Regardless of what challenges life has given us. And there can be plenty when we reach our sixties. Try to be open about life. I have survived so much and know that if I let myself become a victim I will be a miserable woman. Sh*t happens and yes I did not like it, but realise now since moving through heaps can do the coaching work to help people get out of Ruts. Because I had to!
- This is the most valuable part of ourselves. I know that our mind is capable of doing far more than we imagine. A Navy Seal who is now a business entrepreneur says that if we think we cannot get out of a rut we have only gone to 40% of our mindset capacity. And that if Navy Seals stopped at 40% of their mind capacity they would be dead in combat.
- And finally my passion cook great food. Be adventurous, I love the recipes of Ottolenghi, his books do not leave my kitchen bench. Middle Eastern touch to recipes. Am in love with him and his food. Also celebrate your great cooking with a couple of glasses of excellent wine. Remember it is all good for us in our 60s.
I hope these tips and thoughts can help you. And admit that due to so many challenges in my life have had to become resilient and move through SHIT. But importantly change your life from inside out, from your heart and soul, not from your head. Be in touch with the good stuff in your life.
Share your thoughts below.