A woman driving her car gets pulled over ...

A woman driving her car gets pulled over for speeding… 

Woman:  Is there a problem, Officer?  

Officer:  Ma’am, you were speeding.

Woman:  Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Ad. Article continues below.

Woman:  I’d give it to you but I don’t have one. 

Officer:  Don’t have one?

Woman:  Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. 

Officer:  I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. 

Woman:  I can’t do that.

Ad. Article continues below.

Officer:  Why not?

Woman:  I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Woman:  Yes, and I killed and hacked up the  owner. 

Officer: You what?

Ad. Article continues below.

Woman:  His body parts are in plastic bags, still in the trunk of the car if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes five police cars circle the car.

A senior officer slowly approaches the car, with a half drawn gun. 

Officer 2:  Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle. 

Ad. Article continues below.

Woman:  Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2:  One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman:  Murdered the owner? 

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car,  please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty  trunk. 

Ad. Article continues below.

Officer 2:  Is this your car, ma’am?

Older Woman:  Yes, here are the registration papers

The officer is quite stunned. 

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. 

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

Ad. Article continues below.

The officer examines the license, looking rather confused. 

Officer 2:  Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman:  Bet the liar told you I was speeding too. 

Need another laugh? Have a look at some of our other great jokes here!