‘We’ve cut the crap’: Mum refuses to buy her kids Christmas presents

Every parent and grandparent knows how hectic Christmas Day can be with young kids, seeing mountains of opened presents strewn around the house and plastic toys littered everywhere.

But one mum went to drastic lengths to “cut out the crap” and re-do her family’s entire Christmas routine, by banning new gifts for her children and even making her own tree from leftover egg boxes.

Brit mum-of-two Jen Gale, 41, had always been fairly environmentally conscious, but when her kids Will, 10 and Sam, seven, reached toddler age several years ago, she began to rethink exactly what she was buying.

Rather than slowly trying to adapt her family’s lifestyle, Jen made the decision to attempt a major challenge with her husband Ben – not to buy anything new for an entire year. 

Speaking in an exclusive chat with Starts at 60, she admitted Ben took some persuading at first before he eventually came round, adding: “His biggest stumbling point was whether or not he could buy a newspaper. I told him he couldn’t!”

The couple set some rules they could stick by, and the few items they were allowed to buy included food, toiletries, medicines, underwear and shoes for the kids. She explained: “I didn’t want my crazy project to ruin their feet.”

Jen allowed herself to buy things like clothes second-hand and in charity shops, while she mended bits they already had too. 

Shortly after beginning the challenge, the couple faced a Christmas under their new ban – with two kids who still firmly believed in Santa Claus. Asked how she navigated that, she said: “In hindsight, possibly not too well! In our house we do the stockings from Santa, and if grown-ups are getting them a gift then it’s from that grown up.

“So, I ended up putting little hand-made bits in their stockings. I don’t think at that age they were necessarily old enough to clock anything was wrong, but in subsequent years my eldest has gone, ‘Mum, why is this in our stocking, I know you made it’. I’ll just say, ‘I’m just helping Santa out he’s really busy’!”

Jen revealed she made a lot of presents herself, as well as the decorations for that year, adding: “We made the Christmas tree out of egg boxes for example! It was certainly quite a different experience.”

While the dedicated mum and her husband have now relaxed the rules since their year off from buying, they still stick to making things and buying second-hand when possible – particularly at Christmas.

Part of that is not buying new toys or items for their sons, as Jen explained: “For the boys we tend to now get experiences, for example we bought tickets for them to see Robot Wars this year. We’ve also done a sleepover at the Natural History Museum and owl days. It just means it’s not more Lego!”

“Obviously they still get presents from other relatives,” she insisted. “So it’s not like they don’t have anything to open.”

Asked if the primary reason for her sustainable living is still cutting down plastic, or if it is also about becoming less materialistic, Jen said: “I think that’s another part of it, certainly. But I have to confess I do struggle with it still.

“I just remember the excitement of coming down and seeing a massive stack of presents, and I kind of want the same for them. But logically I know that stuff doesn’t equal happiness. There’s a lot of pressure, but it’s finding that balance.”

The family are still making their own decorations and trees now, for example they previously wrapped a lampshade frame in ribbon and also made a pompom tree. And while they allow themselves to buy the odd new thing, they do so “much more thoughtfully”.

Another celebration they’ve adapted is Advent. Rather than offering the kids chocolates each day in the run up to Christmas, they set up messages from the elves suggesting activities they could do as a family.

“The idea was to shift the focus away from getting stuff each day to spending time together as a family,” Jen explained. “Christmas never used to be about getting stuff.”

While she fiercely defends her decision, Jen admitted she does get upset by other people judging her for it, adding: “A couple of years ago I wrote an online piece, and it just went crazy. Some people actually sought me out on social media and sent me messages saying, ‘You’re really cruel and selfish’, and ‘Don’t worry your kids will be bullied’. And that is upsetting.

Read more: ‘Why I won’t be buying Christmas presents for my children this year’

“You do take it to heart and it made me question the impact on the kids.”

She added: “Obviously it’s not for everyone, but I believe in it, truly. As individuals, there is a lot we can do in reining back our consumption. What we’re buying now is unconscious.”

For now, her sons are still young enough not to worry or disagree with their way of life, but she’s all too aware that could change in the next few years.

“I do ask myself at what point do we stop making them live under our values and ethics, because that’s part of growing up – setting your own values and morals. I anticipate that will be difficult at some point,” she said.

Jen now runs her own sustainability blog called Sustainable(ish) With Jen Gale. See her advice on having a “crap-free Christmas” here.

What do you think of Jen’s decision? Do you think Christmas has become too materialistic?