Woman’s heartbreak as her parents ‘show no interest’ in their granddaughter

Becoming a grandparent is often touted as one of the most rewarding stages of life and most people can’t wait for their grown-up children to begin a family of their own, however this is not the case for everyone and some people simply don’t thrive in their newfound role as a gran or grandpa.

One woman revealed this seems to have been the case for her own parents as she opened up about her pain at the fact they have “never showed any interest” in their only grandchild, a daughter who is now 10 years old.

Writing on online forum Mumsnet, the woman, 40, explained that she is not a materialistic person and has raised her daughter to be eco-conscious, revealing the presents she and her husband have bought for her are second hand. She went on to say that her parents do not make an effort for the girl’s birthdays or Christmases, claiming the single present they do usually buy her is “thoughtless” and branding her mum and dad as “stingy”.

“We have always brought our daughter up to believe that Christmas is about family and we donate to the local foodbank,” she wrote. “I consider myself very to be Eco conscious and we have brought my daughter a 2nd hand Fitbit and a 2nd hand Lego set as presents from ourselves this year, partly for costs reasons, but also I’m trying to be more environmentally aware.”

The woman then revealed the situation had really come home to roost in the lead-up to Christmas as her daughter had recently visited a friend’s house and seen how many presents the girl’s grandparents had left for her under the tree.

“She told me that her friend already had lots of presents under their tree and that apparently they were all from the child’s grandparents,” the mum added. “I could see the realisation over my daughters face, that her grandparents are ‘different’ and not in a particularly nice way.

“My parents don’t make an effort at Christmas and all the time my daughter was young, she didn’t fully realise this & we could ‘brush it off’ and so it didn’t really have an impact, but she has grown up so much in the last year and I’m worried that this year I wont be able to hide their insensitivity.”

Concluding her post, the woman said her grievance isn’t about money, revealing that her parents are not strapped for cash, and suggested she’d be satisfied if they simply visited and played board games with her daughter rather than gifting her something “cheap and thoughtless”.

Many people offered their support to the mother, with some suggesting she should speak to her parents about the situation, while others said she should focus on her daughter’s happiness and not let it affect their Christmas.

One wrote: “I completely understand how you feel, my parents don’t bother with my children either and it hurts. Keep working on accepting that they will never change. Be honest with your daughter if she asks- you could explain everyone is different, you don’t know why they are difficult like that but it’s nothing she’s done etc.

“They’re not worth it, just concentrate on your DD [dear daughter]. Piles of presents not required.”

While another commented: “It is sad when grandparents don’t take an interest. It’s sad when grandkids realise this as well! You can only accept that and move on I’m afraid. Merry Christmas to you!”

However others accused the mother of deflecting the situation onto her parents, with one person writing: “Lots of grandparents don’t give piles of presents – if you want your DD to have a stash of presents under the tree, buy them yourself. You don’t have to explain their stingy-ness at all – you could be accused of being stingy yourself with the second hand fit-bit and second-hand Lego.

“When you say the realisation hit her that her grandparents are different – maybe it was actually the realisation that she won’t have a pile of presents – from anyone and what she gets are secondhand!”